Written on: March 30, 2010


Fredalyn & Tina:


Maybe there isn't good or bad luck, maybe shit just happens.  I thought I lost my phone this weekend, we walked around where we came from when finally I reported it lost.  The next day my friend told me he found it in his place.  I was just so relieved and happy, I didn't care that I walked around in search for it, only made me appreciate it more!

Then yesterday, my cat clawed me so bad because I... Uh... Thought it would be funny to wake him up by scaring him.  Yeah, maybe that wasn't such a good idea.  I could tell immediately after that the wound was bad.  It wasn't just a mere surface wound, two of his claws went deep into my flesh before he pulled it back out... Blood started rushing out and rolled off my hand.  Then as I was running to tell my mom, I almost tripped down the stairs cause my hand to fling out and splattered blood everywhere.

But I was just glad I didn't actually trip.

I cleaned the wound and began shivering.  I kept an eye out for it in case it got worse and took pictures to record the process.  If you're not squirmy, read more after the jump (fyi, I there isn't much blood present in the pictures).


Written on: March 26, 2010

Written on: March 17, 2010


Why don't guys [I like ] like me (pt 2):

^Okay, maybe that's why.  hahaha -___-"
Contrary to what you believe, I'm not crazy, I just like to keep myself entertained at all times.

If you ever ask this question to a guy, their first response is,

"Because you only go for bad boys."  I can't emphasize how much I hate that statement.  It is a self pitying statement, an anthem for men who can't get the girls they want and thus blame their failure on the fact that it's because the girl only goes for money and boy boys who drug deal.  If I said a few cases are valid, every guy would say, "Oh, that's mine then."  Based on that logic, any good guy that goes for me I would have to like and despite how many bad guys I reject, the fact that I reject a couple good guys because I felt no chemistry would leave me at wrong.  You have no idea how many times I turned down a guy respectfully and had them hurl insults at me calling me a gold digger and only liking bad boys.  That is so insulting to me when I've always believed more in character than name brands.

If they constantly find that girls go for bad boys, maybe they should stop going for bad girls?  Or maybe they should accept that there was something just not right to establish a match, take their pride and leave rather than accusing the girl of being superficial to save themselves from feeling like a failure.

A lot of guys accuse me of this because I do my hair and like to wear heels... Regardless of what you say, I still think I look different from the gold digging girls.  I don't carry big name brands, I don't have cheap tattoos plastered on my body, nor do I wear mini skirts and walk around half naked with implants hanging out.

Moreover, it is always said before taking a look at who I actually like.  Assuming much?

Well, when I asked the girls they said:

You look feminine, but you act like a guy.

Okay, before you misconstrue that, it's not that I sound like a guy, do disgusting things like a guy or have an abundance of sick perverted jokes to tell, like a guy.  I actually don't get a lot of perverted jokes and I hate hearing stuff like that.  But...  I am really random, hyper, can be cold and don't like nonsense.

A guy wants to feel like he's protecting you, I tend to give out the feeling that I don't need them to.  A guy likes to feel like you're more dramatic than them.  When it comes to guys I'm not close to, I just don't care.


Fredalyn:  "Okay, here's an example.  ____ is actually scared of you now.  He's SCARED of you!!  Last time he wouldn't stop making fun of you, you punched him so hard that he's scared of what he says to you now.  But it's like you weren't mad, you were still smiling, you were just putting him back in his place so he's so nervous around you now!  You can't do that to guys and expect them to think you're cute!!"

Another example:

"You don't know how to flirt.  You laugh a lot and giggle a lot but when a guy disses you, you throw out a harsher diss to get them back harder.  I would just say something like, 'you jerk!' and giggle.  It makes them feel like the girl is so cute and they're the man.  You make them feel like they just got owned."

Then Candy says:

"You are way too detailed man.  You need to hold your personality back a bit when you first talk to someone.  If they don't know you, they think it's cause you're a stalker, not that you have really good memory and think a lot about everything.  You don't go and say, 'hey remember me?  I met you like a year and 3 months ago, we played uno at 1:34am and then .... See, how creepy that is?"

In my defense what I said wasn't THAT bad.  But it still was awkward according to Fredalyn.  Hahaha


Sigh, maybe I'll just take Michelle's valuable life advice.  Girl, seems to know a thing or two:

 She's already gotten the attention of that guy behind her.


Sidenote:  HAPPY BIRTHDAY FREDALYN!! :))

Written on: March 16, 2010

I kept thinking in my head there was going to be a happy ending, that no matter how bad it got, the end would be spectacular ...  Now I'm smarter.  I don't expect a happy ending, but I'm taking all the happiness I can collect along the way to hold me over.


"Michelle, how come guys don't like me?"

michelle:  "That's cause you're not feminine enough.  If a guy tells you to come here you'll be like no bitch, you come HERE.  If a guy asks you to go out for dinner you'll be like, no bitch you bring ME dinner, I ain't going nowhere with you.  You never go out of your way for a guy so they always just think you're not interested."

me:  "Are you kidding me?  When I like a guy I am SO girly and sweet."

michelle:  "Actually, ... When I first saw you holding on to your ex's hand before I was in shock.  I have never seen you hold on a guy's hand before... EVER.  That was already like too much coming from you, I wasn't use to it."

me:  "Dude, I cooked for him while he played video games when he was hungry, I picked out his clothes before work, I made him breakfast in bed practically everyday.  I just didn't do it in the beginning cause I don't do stuff like that for just anybody!  I need to know they're worth it.  (fyi, in the beginning as in for one year he cooked for ME lol)."

michelle:  "YOU COOKED FOR HIM?  WTF.  When my boyfriend's hungry, he only gets to eat if I'm hungry too."

me:  "See, I'm actually sweeter than you!  But no guys I actually like ever like me back :( "

michelle:  "That's cause you're not slutty enough."

Valuable life advice from michelle #103.


Fredalyn's Birthday:


Training her to do cute poses.  So far so good. :P




I'm sorry we ate like 25% of your food supply. =X


"This is Alex.  He's my only white friend to show I'm not racist."

While Fredalyn ran around busy socializing with her friends, we sat in the back watching and eating all the junk food:

Alex:  "Who the f#ck are all these people?  Like how the hell does she even know them.  Why do we seem like the outcasts?"

To compensate for that, we took over the only table there and bullied anyone that reached for some chips or pop:

"Uh, that's $5 please."


My bite vs alex's bite - This is how we kept ourselves entertained.


Like I said, how I keep entertained without Fredalyn.


The poster I made Fredalyn (if you follow my twitter... I THINK I wrote this on my twitter.  If not nevermind hahaha)


Alex, is such a jerk.  Seriously.  -____-"



Birthday girl with her crazy cousin who covered all the lights with garbage bags leaving Alex to ask,

"If you're going to cover all the lights, why don't you just turn them off?"

hahahhaha


This is the bitches corner where me and my girls sat away from everyone.  And whoever came over we would stare at them til they felt uncomfortable.  Again, it's how we entertained ourselves.  :P


Okay, the end.

Written on: March 12, 2010

A rare "What I did today" post:

Made Fredalyn stop at the card store while we were at the mall so I could buy her card for her then and there.  "I'm not making two trips to the mall bitch, Look over there."  hahaha <3


You can see her thought written all over her face, "WTF."


Hm... This one seems quite accurate.


Aww!!  This one's soo cute!  "Thinking of you...


HAHAHA
For you guys that are interested in this card, it's at SHOPPERS.


Fredalyn watches as I look at the front, then the back for the price.

Cheap, nice.  I'll take it.

 Fredalyn:  "YOU DIDN'T EVEN LOOK INSIDE!!" 

Written on: March 9, 2010




My thoughts may make me, but it's my actions that define me.


Sidenote:
Whoever searched for my page using this reference is AWESOME.


Hahahaha!!

Written on: March 7, 2010

Beauty Post:  You want to learn to contour?


Fyi, these are my methods that I learned on my own.  Take it for what it's worth, try it at your own risk.  I'm not pretending to be a pro at this stuff... Just for those who asked me how I do my makeup.



1.  A concealer in your skin tone.  This is what I call the camouflager.  2. A concealer 2 shades lighter (I don't even know if it's two shades, just noticeably lighter, ok? hahah)  This is what I call the brightener.   3.  A highlighter - it'll contain a slight shimmer in it to reflect light and catch attention.  This is the plumper.   4.  A bronzer or brown toned blush.  This is the disguiser.


If you want to make your face look longer... Apply (2) The brightener to the tip of your forehead.  just a two finger tip amount is enough, blend it so it's a gradual change.  Also apply it to your the part of your chin that comes forward (there will be a slight dent right below your lip, leave that area alone).  Apply the highlighter gently in all these areas to make it more obvious.

If you want to make your face look shorter:
Apply the brightener to above the apples of your cheeks and extend it horizontally, as well as to the sides of your head.  Bronzer goes on the tip of your chin and tip of your forehead.

Nose:  Apply the brightener down the bridge of your nose.  You can use the brightener to widen the bridge of your nose by making drawing a wider line going down or more narrower by applying a skinnier line.  Widening will shorten the look of your nose while drawing a narrow line gives the illusion of a longer nose.  After carefully blending, you can apply highlighter.


Bronzer can be used on the sides of the nose to strengthen the effect.  But don't choose a color too dark, the nose has to be subtle.  Most people use foundation, but my nose or skin doesn't work well with any foundation, so I don't touch that stuff.  I find it way too heavy and shows dry skin very easily.

I'm not those girls that have makeup for every single thing, I just mix and match.  You don't need to know the names of any certain brands or what they're for specifically, you just need to understand color and texture.

You can even use eyeshadow to contour your nose.  One that doesn't go on your brush easily is the best for your nose otherwise it's easy to overdo it. 



This is a contour brush... But again, I don't really follow rules so I don't always use this one, I find it hard to be precise.



I sometimes use bronzer as blush and dark blush as bronzer.  Color is color.


To get a more plumped look in your skin, use the highlighter, it'll make the area stand out more thus giving whatever it sits upon more roundness.

Use (1) the camouflager to hide the usual imperfections.  You want it to blend in with your skin, not stand out.

To look older, use a more brown tone blush and apply it in a line more or less just under your cheekbones.  To look younger, apply a more rosy, shimmery blush in a circular motion, touching also the apples of your cheeks.

Defining makes people look older while softening make people look younger.


I don't use powder except for the my nose and the middle of my forehead to control shine and oil.  If you wish to use powder, do not drag your skin when applying it!  You'll take off all your concealer and what not!


I have way more shortcuts and tips but that's for another day.  :)







Hair product review w/ hair tips:




I normally don't use these "deep therapy" conditioners because they usually make my hair feel SO smooth that its flat to my head and has no volume whatsoever.  I'm not one of those people who look good with hair flat hair... Volume is my friend!

My hair seems to produce enough hydration for itself so I avoid using conditioner or else my hair will also become too flat and thin... I actually "taught" my hair to become thicker.  I use to have such fine hair that where ever I went, it would become extremely static prone.  I washed it with shampoo only and after several months, it became stronger and thicker.  I never comb my hair when wet (or even when dry) - it untangles itself as it dries.  Fyi, combing your hair makes it break especially when it's tangled with water, you'll find your hair full of split ends after a while!

Well, this "conditioner" I'm in love with.  It didn't give that feeling like it's super slippery or silky... It actually seemed to coat it and made it feel so much THICKER and stronger!  It feels like you just cut your hair!  How amazing is that?  Even Fredalyn thought I cut it!


You can even SEE that my hair is thicker!  Compare it with my last post picture:


Yeah? :)


Ahh... Thick hair, loves it.

Written on: March 2, 2010

Lying in bed; starring at the stars that cannot be seen and listening to the words that can never be said.




I can abandon my thoughts, but they can never abandon me.


True suffering can only come as a whole.
It's not from the pain one feels in a given moment or during a phase in life.  Suffering is only suffering when nothing worthwhile has amounted from it.  If your reward is there, it was never suffering but merely hard work.  To suffer for nothing, that is what tragedies are made of.